Eating a burrito bowl w/ queso sauce is about as cool as the first time you have sex w/ out a condom
Just so you know, I have a bf.
I guess as long as you bring single girls over and cook cannolis you will still be useful.
My hand is eating my burrito and not saving any for my mouth. TRIPPPPPPPPPPPPPPINN!
I'm just gonna be the bigger person here and say I want you inside me
Haha its ok. When we got back you sat in the car and attempted to tell me in sign language you were blacked out lol
Maid of honor is brides sister and single. Likes lemondrops. You're welcome.
I hope your lack of response means you're banging, not talking about her purity ring.
What sexual position says im sorry for your loss?
He was so drunk he was throwing the bowling balls into other lanes on purpose. He still beat my high score thought.
Hey I'm sorry for head butting you last night. Personally I thought it was funny at the time, but I can see how from your perspective it may not have been as enjoyable for you... Hope your lip is okay.
I seriously want to say to him "Do you know how many blow jobs you could have gotten this summer?"
Yeah probably not. I have a hair appt, a gun class, and hopefully a boy to fuck. I'm booked.
Good, I would never sleep with your boyfriend , or send you an edible arangment
Good friends go out of their way to crop dust your ex not once but twice. I knew we were friends for a reason
Also, what day were you thinkin we should trip balls at the children's museum?
Randomize
