Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
Im in the beachers at wrigley listening to four lesbians debate the pros and cons of 2girls1cup. Success.
halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
It's like split custody, only he's not a kid and they have sex with him.
Attn every girl I've slept with in the past 26 years of my life. One of you cunts gave me herpes. This is the 4th of 5 group MMS. That's right. It's in the 50s. There are two girls I don't have #s for. One was on a cruise and the other was a prostitute in Amsterdam. So which of you has herpes?
Hey, just wanted to let you know that University Police stopped by and repossessed the stolen laundry basket. And the 8 bottles of detergent.
Apparently it is frowned upon to ask the bouncer to stop pointing his flashlight in your face and step back so you can puke....and then do it
I'm sitting in my room naked waiting for him. When he gets here im going to make him do 20 pushups and lick my clit for a hour
He just walked from his house to mine. Walked in and asked for a hug and then left.. And he's sober.
when you're a senior and the freshman guy you wake up next to asks who you are, you DO NOT give him your real name.
you literally stared at me for three minutes and then said "hey this tequila isn't gonna drink itself, boss"
i am rolling on molly so fucking hard i want to do 300 cartwheels
i tried giving myself a bikini wax.1. i hate you 2. i think i'm dying
Birthday wine tasting got super shambly super quickly. I am covered in cuts/bruises/terrible life decisions.
Randomize
