Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
I want to leave work and go home and eat Five Guys and masturbate
Suite mates just came in and said that we have to go to Africa. They're already packed. Didn't know you could get that high.
so i was dancing to the glee soundtrack with highheels. i tripped. and the dildo fell on my face. i dont know what happened.
Writing a love song to planned parenthood. what rhymes with "don't have AIDS"
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
Well he fell three stories from the balcony and still had the strength to fuck me for 2 hours.
Oh were you the stripper at that club last Sunday when i was trippin on acid wearing a giraffe outfit?
the straight edge chick smoked with me, because according to her my bowl is pretty
Her ass is the reason I still believe in a higher power
all we have is white fucking wine this is a travesty it's christmas not a fucking funeral
I feel badly that he has cancer, but this does not mean I am obligated to have sex with him. Again.
JEREMY RENNER GOT DIVORCED. I STILL HAVE A CHANCE.
At one point I had two blunts in my hand and had no idea where they came from.
My professor just told my lab he could drive us around town in his 1991 Lincoln towncar limo for our bar crawl. This just keeps getting better!
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