I skipped work to stalk him.
ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
I just saw a man vacuming his front lawn. What is this world coming to?
The drunk teletubby stumbling out of the place tipped me off..
I know its hard to believe that I'm already drunk at 12 p.m. but I am, so dont call me asking to go to the gym.
Just charged fat mistake $3 for a beer.
It's a gift. Kind of like morning wood in my brain.
I was too sleepy and drunk to verbally annihilate anyone and ruin their reason for being. So i just opted to sleep with the fitted sheet on the floor
I've fucked 6 of my brothers' friends. I'm completely fine with him fucking the girl we ate lunch with.
So my quick shower turned into a "lay in the shower and let the hot water reign over you because you are too hungover to wash your hair" shower. I'll be there closer to 1:30!
A gay guy went down on me in the club bathroom and then fixed my makeup for me
its gonna be a great night
This feeling I'm having... is it love or a combination of alcoholism and unprotected rough sex
They're either celebrating their tax money or trying to kill each other.
this new dose of ADD meds is totally being waisted with the unemployed new graduate thing if only I could add my hyper focused side effects to a coverletter
Randomize
