That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
My wife googled 'purchase vibrator.' Not sure if I should be excited or offended.
The problem with having your drunkeness documented at a wedding is not only does it show up all over facebook, but all over professional photography websites.
Between cock and motorcycle I'm glad I don't have to sit at work tomorrow
My professor complimented me on the well drawn penis on my face then asked if I would like a seat closer to the garbage can.
Spent 200 bucks on a stripper for a good night hug. I give up.
I feel like somebody took my brain out. Stomped on it with cleats. And then put it back together with a glue stick. Thank you.
Well after the shots I danced with a homeless guy, split my toe on broken glass, and had a 20 piece mcnugget. Who says postgrad life is boring.
I want him for more than banging and buying me potato salad. Is this what love feels like?
No man we're leaving now. The party will probably be busted soon. O and a bitch started throwing knives around the place, like real actual knives.
be right there i have to get my cape
Can you get snapchat back so I can show you all the places I threw up in/on last night?
I'm just to the point my give a fucks is so far in the red that I'm going to have to take out a 30yr loan of fucks to repay it
Haha holy fuck. i dont remember much after pissing on your ex's flaming nude pics.
Randomize
