woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
I give him blow jobs while he watches sports.. how am I not his gf yet??
you were leaning against the vending machine asking if there was a shower you could puke in.
These eggs taste like chocolate chip cookies. This is the best hangover ever.
If you go to the bathroom don't ask why there's diet coke on the toilet. Loller copter. Blow is fun.
thank you for letting me use your house as a brothel.
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
Technically ya I did. Hes tried to get down my pants like 3 times now and every time I have been all "these are not the Droids you are looking for"
Wow, I just woke up in this conference with the woman beside me staring at me. This is what happens when hungover people sit in warm rooms...
I'm so sexually frustrated I feel like I'm going to kill my turtle
Had a slight melanoma scare this morning. Spoiler alert, it was Nutella.
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
Good, I've got all this booze. It's intimidating to be in the room alone with it..
Who cares if he’s younger, he’s hung like a moose. Your vagina will never forgive you if you pass on that dick
Best part though was when he wanted to cuddle and I was like, I'm going to go.
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