I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
im like that movie w. ryan reynolds, no ones ever going to date me unless they're forced to marry me.
about to try to wax my asshole... wish me luck
is it weird that i blow-dry my hair and poop at the same time?
not any weirder than you telling me this at 4 in the morning
she reminds me of the kind of girl who'd fuck in church if you asked. I can dig it.
i shall enjoy my approximately 2 hours of being sober today
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
malibu coconut giveth, and malibu coconut taketh away
and you will have a crown and it will be made of penises and all will bow before you and your glorious penis crown
I can't wait to get home and drunk cuddle your dog
ill be home in an hour. Be in my bed ready for disappointment
CAPS.LOCK.AND.SPACEBAR.ARE.BROKEN.
dude idk where I am. fuckin like. there wheat field and a horizon and shit. I think I got on a bus? some dude named Sam gave me a pamphlet about Jesus.
i guess she just walked over ass naked and peed on his laptop. gonna call an over price on that drunk sex.
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
Randomize
