went in for an STD check and they referred me to an alcohol and drug councilor. kick me when i'm down.
oh btw spread eagle is not an appropriate phrase to use in a scientific presentation. learned that the hard way
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
we were wasted and he didn't have a condom so he called the front desk and asked for one. They didn't "officially" have them but the night manager happened to have one in his wallet. He brought it to the room with two mints.
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
good news: I made it out of bed and into shower. Bad news: I made it back to bed without clothes. Worse news: I don't know this bed.
I gave her at least chlamydia. Maybe worse. She is also into chicks and loves taking naked pics. It's like the less I believe in Jesus, the more he rewards me.
Oh god he's like Julia Roberts in pretty woman... And I'm the one who's gotta make a lady out of him.
Hey please buy toilet paper today. Plastic grocery bags are starting to hurt now
I think I left my chapstick at your house when I tried using your penis as a catapult and flung it on the floor. Be a dear, and try to see if you can find it.
Are you stuck outside of your house because you forgot to walk up stairs? Cuz I've been there.
Quick question. How did my clothes end up in your room on your bed and I end up outside your room naked on your couch?
They got mad when I cut the pizza with an x-acto knife. Oh well, more for me then.
My face is going numb. I think it's time I call it quits
Just saw you run by my class yelling "fuck you!". Good luck and stay human!
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