i just googled "what is oprah really like?" how do YOU think my night is going?
Fyi mom and I voted and you're the DD tonight, congratulations
so, is "hi, did i take your virginity six years ago and never call afterwards?" an appropriate greeting in a bar?
you kept looking at stripers and saying " Go to College"
Sunday is a myth, I refuse to believe that I waste an entire day unable to function after a night of drinking.
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
People are stripping in McDonalds. Do I join?
YES.
So just what does one wear when attending a sex toy party with ones mother-in-law?
Jeans and a nice top.
So the next time I call you and say I'm going to my first strip club because it's christmas eve eve, and have work the next morning, I'd appreciate you stopping me
you ran up to the police and said "fuck the police shit we living in hell ". Then you dropped your Margarita and said "Darby Out" lol
We got stuck in traffic in the tunnel while we were smoking weed. We were afraid to air out the car.
I'm twenty nine years old, now is not the time to start trying new drugs. I need a hedge fund...not another drug-induced hangover.
So was this before or after he cried about trump?
After
Last night was great... In the "I got videotaped making out and getting a handjob on the couch in front of 100 people." kinda way.
Someone just said “I need to use up this money before I’m tits up under the dirt” so I think I’m going to start using that in my daily vocabulary.
Randomize
