She was like a white Oprah, but with less conviction.
do you ever facebook stalk someone so much you think their inside jokes are yours?
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
He said he wanted to see my room, not my womb. It's a common mistake.
I mean we've tried to get high on nutmeg, we clearly dont know the definition of "too far"
The usual. Woke up on a dog bed with peeps and $11.
My vagina supports interfraternal relations
Your boyfriend and I are bonding over your giant dick.
Jesus Christ that hit just spoke to so many levels of my soul. It's caressing them softly
You might be at the point of severe desperation when you gotta hold the two pieces of your broken vibrator together just to get off.
So I fucked him. Then I MC Hammer'd to the bathroom, where I did the robot in celebration of my accomplishment. And then I spent 10 mins fixing my toilet. But YOLO.
just had sex in my dorm hall public bathroom while wearing my favorite cat sweater. tonight was a win
im too broke to be in a relationship this close to the holidays
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
How is someone going to pee on the floor two days in a row? Fuck this place.
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