Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
so I ended up banging her last night
dude I remember her. You sure it was a her?
i don't even remember
She had to get her inhaler in the middle of fucking...but she kept it in.
It's very clear that i'm the girl sweating out four lokos at 2 in the afternoon at the gym
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
I want to have a prehistoric party. By that, I mean I want to dress up as a dinosaur and get drunk. That's all I want in life.
If you fool around, take the WHITE sweatshirt off of her first. It's mine, and I don't like your cum nearly as much as she does.
I don't know what it is about vodka that make me ruin relationships.
I've already agreed to hook up with 3 people tonight, and its not even 2:00 yet... I think this is what the path to success looks like.
He was dressed up as Jesus and had vodka in one hand while he was blessing everyone and splashing them with holy water in the bathroom.
I dealt with the imported moonshine, but when the cocaine came out, I had to get the fuck out of there
can we just punch him in the dick and call it a victory for feminism
Started crying to "that's the way it is" by celine. What the fuck uterus?!
I only wore my thong with cheeseburgers on it because I thought we'd have sex. So I basically wasted my best thong for nothing.
The married guy I've been fucking broke it off because I'm not a trump supporter and don't share his "traditional values".
Randomize
