nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
You said I was the most beatiful preggers youve ever seen...im not pregnant
I'm drunk in class and I'm pretty sure the bible freak behind me is saying a prayer for me
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
apparently i was just sitting there with my shirt down holding my boobs saying "its ok. its all gonna be ok"
there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
You convinced us both to take shots of jack Daniels through our eyes.
I'm wearing too many socks to be ok with this.
One of the annoying girls in my 7 AM class showed up drunk for her 21st birthday and just auctioned off her fake ID.
It was like we had a conversation with our eyes.
Was it a good conversation?
It was an awkward, sexual conversation.
I'm sure there are thousands getting dick today in the name of independence
I was so drunk, he put me to bed and went down stairs to hang out with his friends. Apparently, I was curled up in the closet, spooning the dresser when he came back up.
i just want a beer and a blow job. is that so much to ask?
and i just want a ring so i can stop faking it. is that?
Omg I just smoked and it was the end so I basically got resin and death, my throat feels like the twilight vampire description of their thirst for blood
Randomize
