i jhust puked up my retainher.
Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
At what number of girls whose last names are stored in your phone book as drinking establishments does it become excessive?
i officially have more pictures of his dick than pictures of us together
just bought 2000 rhinestones and a heart shaped stencil at Micheals...I think the cashier knows i'm Vajazzling
Please tell me I did not ask the bartender how big his dick was.
Im thinking about quitting weed for my dog
I AM HAVING A WEIRD OUT OF BODY EXPERIENCE. IN CAPS LOCK.
And some old guy told me Jesus loves me and I laughed super hard and told him sinning is fun. Hahaha
She was kinda cute. So long as you don't mind neck tattoos and bad life choices.
She's trying to put on her dog muzzle on her self
I feel my soul being ripped out of my eye sockets
i may or may not be making depth charges with cough syrup. i'll call you if i survive.
I'm sorry I crashed your motorcycle and watched you get robbed from a rooftop. Will you please come back or at least drop off my shoes?
its 8 and I'm HUNGOVER!! how is that possible??
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