Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
Somehow after we left in 3 different cars to all go to different places we still all ended up in the emergency room
And I'm supposed to be surprised that you got another concussion?
We were debating whether rain water is clean enough to drink. I won when he started throwing up.
Hungover and I may throw up in my therapist's office. Maybe he is right about my drinking
Today is an "outside sex" kind of day.
An d I'd rather cry while putting a waffle in my mouth than cry on my pillow, ya feel me?
is it too soon to tell him I'm available anytime for Christmas themed pity sex and I'll even wear a Santa hat?
He just pulled his sweatpants down and pissed in the middle of our garden
Vibrator fell off the top of the dresser and hit me. This might be the most embarrassing black eye incident ever
my life is like one bad, slutty lifetime movie.
What can I say, like your penis. The fact that I like the person attached to it helps too
Do you remember standing up at 3 in the morning and asking me if I was counting to six?
He agreed to matching Christmas pajamas today, no guy does that for a girl he’s not seriously considering marrying.
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