the day after is always just damage control
Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
My T9 text prediction thing keeps predicting every next word is going to be "midgets".
Nobody is wearing shirts anymore. What is happening.
Dude you didn't move for like 2 hours then suddenly sang the chorus to ghetto superstar and passed back out
I HAVE A PRESENT FOR YOU AND ITS NOT MY VAGINA
I JUST HAD PHONE SEX. WHILE TAKING A BATH. FOR AN HOUR. EATING A PLATE OF BURRITOS. TOP THAT SHIT.
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
Is it inappropriate to send a happy 3-year anniversary of having a threesome with you and your ex girlfriend on easter text?
You're talking about alcohol when the smell of hand sanitizer is too much for me right now
No kiss but I got free McDonald's so at least we can focus on what is really important here
It's cool bro. The video I have of you drunk trying to fix it with the sonic screwdriver was worth it.
I hate when pubes grow back. My mons is a warzone.
The lady in the stall next to me just screamed "why are you so hairy!?" and "why can't you get any!?" to her vagina. WTF
Randomize
