even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
You never go ass to mouth. That's quite possibly the most important rule Paramedic school has taught me.
Just because you're using the Hipstamatic app for your nude photo taking, it doesn't make your drunken blowjob pics any classier.
i'm pregaming while finishing a paper on cardio myocyte contractility in mice. i'm kicking finals week's ass right now
This is one of those moments when you do what I say or I come stalk you down like a gazelle.
Just realized how sopa could affect my ability to watch porn, son of a bitch
Just saw a hooker eating a pastrami sandwich walking down beach blvd blowing kisses to traffic. My day = made
WHY ARE THERE NO BLACK EMOJIS? I CAN NEVER PROPERLY IDENTIFY MYSELF.
There must be a happy medium universe where you get it on with my girlfriend enough to cause me pain but not a full on cardiac arrest. It's a fine line to tread though.
Just used my flashlight app to find a gummy lifesaver I dropped on the floor
I like how you're utilizing your resources
nothing says "fuck you jocks from high school my life is better than yours" like bringing 5 grand in 20s to the bar
I now have a other guy willing to drive 3 hours for my vagina. At my next gyno appointment I'm asking her if there's cocaine in there.
Also he said my vagina was sculpted by gods so there must be some feelings here.
Do you think it's my receding hair line that makes all the milfs attracted to me??
Randomize
