its 9am. i just got home. spent 6 hours blowing him in a closet last night
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
HOnestly. That's my one goal for this whole trip. I don't give a shit about souvenirs or sand. I want penis.
I didn't budget in chasers this month so were chasing everything with water. Sorry.
this cock blocking thing really has to end bro...its one thing to tell jen i live with my mom.. its another to cut the brakes on my car..
The thumbs up barstamp on my hand is mocking my hangover with its positivity.
Wtf are freshmen gonna think when the first thing they see in a pale 6'4 white kid with a mustache yelling ya man and we be liming in a Trinidadian accent
How are you not embarrassed to know me. I'm a mess right now. I'm a walking, talking tornado of embarrassment
Omg, those nutella cakes are heavenly, like licking the nipples of a muscular black Jesus.
I can tell right now that knowing you will either be really fun or ruin my life
To be honest, waking up to 20 naked people in my house was not the weirdest thing to happen to me in the past 24 hours
Visibly drunk girl eating alone at a souplantation just spilled salad all over her body. It was me
Dick. I'll go round and break his windows. I've been watching Sons of Anarchy on Netflix.
There's no time frame.
For drinking wine out of the bottle and taking nyquil at 9 AM? There probably should be.
It shouldn't be this hard to find someone who you haven't blown.
Randomize
