do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
if your not going to answer your phone this is just going to be an embarrassment tomorrow
So..he has a girlfriend BUT she rarely writes on her wall and is only in 5 of his 371 tagged photos and her default pic is her with some other dude. It cant be serious
Oh my god you need to get off of facebook.
On duty sugar tits. A Marine never abandons his post to take nudi pics.
IT'S A FUCKING GIANT POKEBALL MAD OUT OF TINY ROSES
Two cats fucking in the middle of the street. I sat there and watched in my car because I didn't want to cock block the male by honkin my horn.
I called my mom while I was blackout drunk, and told her I was drunk, safe, and happy. But really, I was just drunk.
He told me I was "too flexible." Excuse me?
I'm the girl holding the bag of goldfish
I believe you can. But if you can have rum with breakfast then do that. Definitely do that.
Watching Colbert Report and porn at the same time.
Im bringing my light up rubber ducky just in case we end up at a rave tonight. HE CHANGES COLOR!
To describe how high he was he said, " I'm cocked out of my ape sandwich" so yes...that was some pretty good weed.
I am 11 times too hungover to give the eulogy
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