Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
I wish I could test you the smell I just had to experience. It smelled like this lady was microwaving squirrel rectum.
Yea went to the bars and he called me 2 hours later with random people saying he is at a place that i don't think exists
Currently in a meeting. i am playing the not throw up game. god i hope i dont lose.
i bought a pregnancy test with dimes. Is that trashy?
He just walked into my room in a robe with a cooking pot of cereal.
I just pictured my inhibition personified as little pink piggies with wings flying off into the great wide nowhere hahaha
The attempted closet masturbation was unforgivable.
That was the most fucked up I've ever seen him. He had the fucking Canola Oil!
The great part about clubs is that you can fart everywhere and nobody knows! The bad part is I'm on e and i have nobody to fondle.
Literally just napped at strip club. Don't know how long
after we got done having sex, you rolled over and ask what your yelp review was. So yea I'm kinda mad.
Afterwards I drank a whole bottle of cake vodka in the bathtub while he was bawling his eyes out. Hands down weirdest hookup I've ever had.
so i went over to her house and we played crash bandicoot, ate calzones, and had sex all day. im in love.
I always want to see you. Honestly my only hesitation is that my ass is still kind of sore from Sunday 🥺
Have you actually looked at the corn flakes box? I don't think the rooster has a soul.
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