we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
you announced to the whole room that instead of shaving you were planning to start straightening and then braiding your pubes. awkward silence followed by everyone leaving.
I dinstinctly remember making out to "I believe I can fly" and waving my arms like a bird to the beat.
She was so loose she sounded like a jar of salsa. I didn't know that was even possible.
Well, think of it this way, if this were 200 years ago your father would have received the most goats in all the village for your fertile loins. Think about that.
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
So I love how we keep introducing our friends to sex toys. It's like pay it forward vibrator edition.
Was behind a guy going 20 for 4 miles I'll be there as soon as the universe quits fucking me
We let 3 boys take us home and then we woke up in the middle of the night, stole all the coozies out of the house, a loaf of bread, a case of water, a pair of shorts, called a cab, and went home.
Wearing the same clothes for three days in a row and eating an entire two pound bag of jelly beans really has a way of making a person rethink their life...
Not remembering where I left my grinder before vacation #stonerproblems
We had sex to beyonce's "drunk in love" and then he order me pizza. It was perf
Tried to put an eye patch on while hooking up with a girl. She was not amused.
Halfway through missionary I realized I was partially laying on his sleeping dog and idk that just kinda ruined it for me sooo
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
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