Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
and apparently i was drunk enough to follow up with "I'd let me touch your boobs" ... not my best line.
ohhh no, absolutely not. i am waaayyy too superstitious to have sex with the self-proclaimed "baby-maker" on father's day...
Umm I need a rain check. Long story short is I have scabies. Research it if you want. I'll tell you everything another time soon, I promise.
Just so you know I would totally fuck you. Does that count as a feeling?
He just said "fuck you" to the bowl he's eating things out of
Her idea of kinky involved a tazer
wtf?
I'm going back tonight
I may hire someone just to sell my family the drugs they keep asking me for. It's cutting into my doing drugs time.
She got the hiccups while deep throating me. It was epic. Once in a lifetime experience.
I really really need to have and out of body experience just so I can talk to myself about this shit that I'm doing with my life.
He left for work so I drank pickle juice from his fridge
He yelled at me to keep it in my pants and I replied with I will fuck your roommate as much as I please. Oops
the girl next to me was drawing sonic the hedgehog on her exam what the fuck
godspeed
I really just gave up on masterbating because I'm too tired. I really am getting old.
I learned three things this morning. Don't get out of my car without my keys, don't let a girl paint my nail unless I'm getting laid by said girl, and lastly I learned how to break into my own car.
Randomize
