i'm telling everyone you had sex with a puerto rican drug lord
Just got the American Express annual summary for 2009. The amount of bars we visited last year is impressive.
i've noticed that whenever i have to ask myself "would i be doing this if i was sober?" the answer is probably no.
She passed out on top of the bar. Still did body shots off her.
Thanksgiving break drinking is a marathon, not a sprint, and i need to be well rested
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
She took a picture of me when she thought I was sleeping. I don't know whether to be amused or scared.
If I were there, I'd be putting a martini in you, via funnel if need be, and you would be doing this thing.
He calls it "his noble steed" and i plan to ride it.
Also, am I the only one who noticed he didn't fuck you until after you were technically a cripple? Or am I reading into this too much? Congrats on that btw
dude, we need a reunion soon, my vagina needs a deep massage. The kitty is ready to play
My walk of shame is starting to become positively reinforcing; I stop by Starbucks and when I leave I look someone just heading to work.
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
good morning. i just did a walk of shame in front of his grandmother.
It started with drunk jenga and ended with me simultaneously peeing and puking on his feet in the tub while he held me up. I met Tequila. I don't like her.
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