Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
like what am i supposed to say "im thinking of how bad that sex was"?
He waited til after we had sex to tell me he had herpes... Ugh I hate being drunk
Would it help you get over me if I told you that I had unprotected sex last night?
theres a wall by my room thats like, a prime fucking wall. before i move out SOMEBODY is gonna fuck me on that wall, goddamnit.
Jail wasn't bad. Was poppin Xanax the whole way there
I forgot how wholesome of a place a park is when youre not drinking there.
The police report said that there were 25 cases of bud light, two hookers fighting in the street, 13 cop cars, and two road blocks, a kid got tazered, another got maced, and over a hundred people in the house
So that means its a bad thing that your dad found it huh?
And really all I wanted was to be like "hey can I borrow your dick for a few hours this weekend?"
I can't even masturbate without crying fuck this break up
I say I hate my boss but I find myself jerking off to him more and more with each passing day
Oh my god. We just got locked out of our cabin and went to the neighbor's to see if they had a key and caught the neighbor jerking it. My night > your night
I just want him to go down on me while I eat a burger. Is that too much to ask?
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
Angels sing when his face is between my thighs. I came 3 times before he even came up for air.
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