Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
WIFE SWAP. FAMILY OF MIDGETS. LIFETIME. NOW.
TIT CHECK! TIT CHECK! ALERT! ALERT!!!!
Captain Phil from deadliest catch died... im trying to think of a memorial fb status but "ill miss your crabs" doesnt sound right
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
BTW waking up to a picture of you taking a shot of what I can only assume was shitty lukewarm liquor out of a blow up dolls butt made my day
This conversation has now reached a level of awkward that even a passerby streaking hobo couldn't break.
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
I'm trying to poop and took acid, this is going to end horrid or wonderful. Oh the amusement park, not the pooping.
Was so close to hoppin on it but then I realize it's not a dick and I needed to keep walking. Primal instincts.
Okay, so when I go to meet your grandma, let's do a quick cum check to we don't have another "what's that on your face?" situation.
If they start to date again I refuse to help her sext him. Helping my mom sext my dad is where I draw the line.
We walked around last night for hours saying nothing but nom nom nom and barking at each other.
Is it uncouth to masturbate the night before a gyno appointment?
Randomize
