I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
so how was last night?
got high and had our usual talk about the definition of cole slaw. then tried to call the ramen noodle company and convince them why my face should be on thier packages.
I sat alone in Buffalo Wild Wings eating chocolate cake on Country Western karoake night. The waiter asked me if I was ok. Twice.
Come help me clean. I know we won't be getting our security deposit back...but I would like to move out with our dignity.
I had to write an apology letter to security guards in the hotel so I didnt get kicked out
I'm not sure what happened. But I must have won because I obviously stole two full pitchers of beer from the bar and taped a note on them saying "your welcome"
I really gotta be careful. My email inbox is equal parts notifications from instructors and this dude's dick. If I get drunk and reply to the wrong thing I might get kicked out of grad school.
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
my mom was by far the drunkest one there. best impromptu wednesday afternoon party ever
I told her the party couldn't handle my playlist LAZERBAWLS and I was right. Cops in the basement, orgy in the kitchen, jousting in the living room.
If you take a post shower shit just get back in bed. You're better off starting your whole morning all over again.
I threw up in a flower pot outside the bar last night and have a date tonight....I think I missed something
Are you missing a tooth after last night? Because I found one in my coat pocket...along with what smells like dried jäger and a package of deer jerky.
Uh not that I recall.
Oh wait nvm. It's mine. Yeup, definitely my tooth.
Alcohol and I aren't friends right now.
I just volunteered myself to get tazed this should get interesting
Randomize
