is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
im so hungover...we just watched The Perfect Storm and i got seasick
She laid down on my bed and played "I want you to want me" on my laptop. subtle.
The security guard popped his head over the mens room door and goes "nice tits- now get out." Deer in headlights moment right there.
It's basically the same plan, only step one gets revised to "look hot enough that he forgets I fucked his roommate"
I though us hooking up in the field was your way of saying you were an outdoors person
As i was laying there shouting that he dislocated my hip he actually reached his armed around and patted himself on the back
I just made the pizza guy say helicopter six times in order to get his money. Even he knows how stoned we are.
i feel like i am made of mashed potatoes. i love cannabis pills so. fucking. much.
I emailed the police apartment to apologize to the officer from last night. I practically threw a hissy fit because he wouldn't hug me.
It was "against protocol"
I was so fucked up last night that I peed on his FATHER'S BED and fell asleep there. and yes. his father was asleep in the bed
They took the TVs out of the gym and the mini-Mart only had 2% milk. 2015 wants me to be fat
So apparently dinosaur erotica does, in fact, exist.
Aka I'm headed to the liquor store because I don't know how to handle my emotions.
For someone I see at the bar by herself all the time... I should have know she had a tazer.
Randomize
