so my phone accidentally called my dad from my purse at 2:14am....he has a 5 min voicemail of me discussing how Alicia should bang the guy who eats good pussy... i can never look at my dad in the face again....
I'm giving up shame for lent. Here come the best 40 days and nights of my life.
If we have to be apart I understand. Being separated is probably best for our relationship now. I look forward to our booty calls.
just peed on my foot to get a spider off. that lazy.
how do I tell him nicely and in french that we can't have sex anymore because his huge penis will ruin me for other french men?
I should have but it might be too early in this fuckbuddyship to emasculate him
Drinking with a woman who gave an anti-drugs speech at my high school. Somehow, not surprised.
If people don't want my drunken phone call then TAKE YOUR FUCKING NUMER OFF OF FACEBOOK, like it's just that easy...
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
Just because I tried to backhand you with a fist full of cash does not make me violent
how is telling me how long you drunkenly fucked someone supposed to make me miss you?
Curled up in the fetal position, trying not to throw up or think about my future, and humming songs from musicals to myself. You?
Turning 21 will be slightly bittersweet. Never again will I be able to get underage drunk at Disney World, now I'll only be able to get legal drunk and that just sets a whole different and sad tone for my life.
Love these next 4 months. Wake up from a college football hangover and get to put your hand down your pants and watch NFL football all day.
You know. You being in a happy healthy relationship is REALLLYY cutting into our drinking alone together time.
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