I wouldn't call it sex. It's like when you put a plug in a socket half way. It's not all the way in but it still turns on the light.
high people should be assigned attendants
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
At my wifes high school reunion. Found out her nickname was 'Back Door Brooke'. EVERYONE is calling her that.
VODKA 4LOKO BEER NOT IN THE CLEAR
Wait, is this the kid that tried catching a bat in your backyard with a flashlight and a ball of tin foil?
Discovered a freckle on my clitoris. What have you done today?
spring break - time to see if my two week detoxing gave my liver a chance to recover.
Other than my penis smelling like an ashtray, it went really well.
Yea. I feel great. My life is great. My job isn't as shitty. And my daddy loves me. I love strip clubs. Great self esteem boost.
Hi I haven't talked to you since you bought legal marijuana-are you still stoned?
coughing up blood. I'm leaving for the doctor now. P.S. I just won $350 on the wheel of fortune machine in the casino.
He came on my favorite pants. He is dead to me.
How many times have you told me to call 911 this week?
Lol twice
Drunk text the hot guy two doors down confessing my love for him.... He gave me a thank you card today.
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