Is it sanitary to roast marshmallows over a cigarette lighter?
You stood next to him taking HUGE gasps of air in an attempt to second hand smoke his cig because you didn't have one...
If I should ask "why am I still single?" could someone please remind me of shooting mike and ikes out of my nose at the bartender last Saturday. many thanks
Well good for him for getting your number before he told you he had no money and needed you to pay for his drink!
It's like an R Kelly music video in here. Only a matter of time before someone pisses on someone
I took her to the bar and boom. All of my past slump busters were there. Shes cool enough to know what that means and said she was afraid they'd eat her so we left.
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
You puked on the bar then proceeded to walk out. I told the bartender some girl walked up, puked and left and he gave me a free drink. Hope you got home safe.
No sorry. I may be a happy drunk but my gag reflux is an angry drunk.
I just had a flashback to us shaking up Gatorade mix and then inhaling it in your kitchen because it was funny. Now I can't stop laughing in work because that is the stupidest shit.
Accidentally made a straight guy question his sexuality again. I really gotta watch myself.
I got off F O U R times, just because he wanted to hear me moan. He is my hero.
Why did two squirrels just run out from behind the couch?
About that.
Just found $31 in my desk drawer. In $1's. WTF happened last night?!
Why does my mask smell like doritoes?
Randomize
