butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
she's like "i'm so proud of u" ... and then i threw up on myself
Girl last night got so wet when I was going on down her it flooded up my nose. I nearly drown
I'm at my inlaws playing Scrabble. Go Fuck Yourself.
New dating criteria: what kind of ex will this person be?
the girls im babysitting are trying to see how much jello they can swallow without chewing...their future boyfriends are lucky
You convinced us both to take shots of jack Daniels through our eyes.
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
Is your answer to that text seriously a right parenthesis
I think that was him coming out to me. I just brushed it off
My mouth tastes like what I imagine a hobo's skin would taste like.
How do you delicately ask if your friend's dad was arrested for solicitation of prostitution?
He also reminds me slightly of a pirate which i find strangely attractive
this is a PSA to never have sex in a bed from ikea
Explain to me how we're not being documented on? A gynecologist I saw two times 8 years ago popped up on my people you may know list on fb. What in the actual fuck?
The only thing I remember about us having sex is yelling at him to choke me.
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