I don't do stupid things anymore. I do stupid people.
all i wanna do is slam about 38 beers eat a whole pizza and wake up naked in the taco bell parking lot
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
I'm so horny
I have no idea who this is, but I'm up for a lecture on self-respect
this is really not the time to pretend we have morals
She just rubbed her face all over pool chalk. I feel like it's time to go
Apparently after taking body shots off of a guy i haven't seen since 1st grade, i ate a stick of butter, showed everyone my tampon string, and fell off the boat. my uggs belong to the sea now
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
Def just hooked up with my brother's senior prom date in his bed. Does that make me the worst brother ever?
Nope if you can't be there for me emotionally, then my vagina can't be there for you physically. That's my rule.
Good news. That bum you thought that died is alive.
Zak is like the Picasso of masterbatory texts
should we try and roll a cross joint since its good friday? you know, for jesus
Ethically, this is the worst thing I've ever done. Financially, however...
Guess it's not a good idea to try lighting a cigarette with my stove drunk, I burnt off half my bangs.
Randomize
