respond to me or i'm telling everyone that you inserted a vodka soaked tampon into your anus
She told me a very interesting story, complete with pantomimes, about how she got a habanero seed in her vag
the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
Hey, you guys have all had chicken pox, right?
i refuse to be around anyone not wearing a sombrero...its cinco de mayo
The goal for tonight is vagina. In and around. Doesn't matter who. How. Or why.
she tied the funnel to the fucking ceiling...
I woke up this morning and the lid to the back of my toilet was missing. Dahfaq do I do with this shit?
Omg this is like trying to sleep on a pile of ballsacks.
It's a little weird that I'm blowing my wingman.
eating chex mix on the couch when he walks in naked and asks how he looks. are you shitting me.
idk the fact that her roommate had a sign that said "enter without knock, exit without cock" makes me really NOT want to go steal her pot.
we managed to melt a few different forms of plastic into the cannibutter....
Well if your hearts not big enough, your penis certainly is. Just have a threesome
I jerked off 12 hours ago exactly. I owe it to my penis to get laid.
Randomize
