Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
she made me put on a condom before giving me a handjob...this is why i hate freshmen
Be prepared to possibly be invited to a fancy strip club breakfast on Friday and be prepared to say yes.
Ummm. I just wanna say this now: Don't let me invite the band back to the apartment to see my stripper pole.
thats because you have standards... and i have a thing for guys that give me free drugs.
I do remember telling her that I was about to pass out soon and then hiding my pants under my bed so she couldn't take my wallet even drunk I'm thinking ahead
I just sent him 3 long ass texts about how to tell a girl how he feels. I should get a fucking friend zone medal.
I will make you one.
Good. It needs "forever alone" engraved on it
I dunno. We kind of want to have a hippie communing with nature type break. But because we're such alcoholics I feel like we'll just be wasted the whole time in addition to hugging trees and shit
No it'll be my boobs and the luge part will be from my nipples. Everyone will be sucking beer from my perfectly sculpted and partially melted tits.
Side note: Hot guys are now getting with ugly chicks. Alert the media.
On my way home from the dentist. Was going to call and see if you would like to wake and bake, then remembered my sister is an adult
i just thought a plastic bag was my cat. i just pet a plastic bag. that high.
Stop jerking off to vines my recommended list on YouTube is getting weird.
The last time the Patriots won the Super Bowl I lost my virginity. I can only imagine what'll happen if they win this year.
dude, he literally lasted one minute. and i paid 8 dollars for cabs.
Randomize
