I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
Can you tell me we didn't drink from a fish bowl we found in the bathroom last night? I know it would be a lie; I just need to hear it.
ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
Someone left a shot of disaronno in a champagne glass here this morning... flip a coin?
he bit the head off a dead goose for 5 beers. this is my future boyfriend.
I haven't shaved in at least a week, he said "obviously neither one of us was prepared for this"
I've never seen the starbucks guy more terrified than when you dove out the car window after your credit card
Is it bad that I see a party full of girls I know he has fucked as a challenge for me to be the one who ends up in his bed?
I know you hold the fastest time for "zoo downhill wheelchair racing" but I don't see what that has to do with this.
There's a time and a place for everything. Except for getting wasted at a work event, puking in the parking lot, and sleeping in your car overnight.
Oh yea... In other news I've decided to get an external hard drive and start getting music from all the guys I'm fucking... Do you think a terabyte would be enough storage space?
I was kind of torn between "Wow, this is awkward," and "Wow, my therapist is hung."
I woke up hugging my purse and I found a business card in my underwear. How?
Of all of my friend's husbands, I like when yours hits on me best
Awe that means so much to us
It's been so long since I had sex I might propose to the next girl who will sleep with me.
Randomize