I think I'm in Tiajuana
You are not in Tijuana. I saw you an hour ago
I could be
I haven't gotten laid in forever. I'm obsessed. I imagine I this is how Ethopians feel about food.
If I pass out leave the food near me so i can wake up to it
I like one night stands...theyre like crushes for big kids
Just bought a disco ball for 5 dollars, of course we're drinking tonight.
Of course my walk of shame coincided with the alumni marathon on campus. But, I did get a thumbs up from the woman handing out water.
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
I look at sleeping with him as a way to get up in the world. He will lead me on to bigger and better penises.
I wish pancakes were everywhere. Just pancakes. I want lilies at my wedding. No dress. Just priest. Just lilies.
she's unstoppable after she starts doing shots and yelling NANNER
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
I didn't think four grown drunk men could cuddle on a twin size bed, but we found a way.
My roommate is downstairs drunk, smoking, and listening to a self help DVD. Please dear God don't let this be the Ghost of Christmas Future.
Imma make him fuck me with my jersey on tonight while I chant Go Jets Go. Gotta love playoff hockey szn.
Everytime after he came, he'd laugh uncontrolably for ten mintutes. He was sober..
Randomize