doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
I guess I'm in a committed relationship. We just had shot 1 of 3 of Gardasil. I'm now dead inside.
Just helped a homeless man panhandle outside of Wawa, made him $6.31. Where are you?
You're right. Single life welcomed me back with open arms. It's like it knew it wasnt going to be long when I left.
But theres a keg here and me gusta
It's probably because the lack of alcohol in your stomach. Alcohol kills bacteria. I am a doctor. Trust me
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
Well apparently I decided it was easier I piss in the trash can at waffle house than In the toilet. Would've been ok if the trash can was in the bathroom.
I just audibly asked myself if i wanted to masturbate.
And then audibly agreed
Just so you know the unusual amount of skittles on your floor is entirely your own fault. You bought me 20 bags of them while I was high.
How will you ever teach your dogs to pee outside when the biggest puddle on your bedroom carpet is from you?
Just walked past the field playing Jesus music with a fanny pack full of condoms and beer. Happy Sunday.
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
In my defense, the second lapdance I gave was because of a dare.
Relationship goals: we both wore red underwear tonight. Except he won’t know because my bra been off but it’s the thought that counts I guess.
Randomize
