Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
I just woke up to my FedEx of contacts I've been waiting for for about a week and my hungover ass went to the bathroom and used beer instead of contact solution.
And now for everyone's least favorite sport... Drunk babysitting.
I'll pay you to write the paper but not for sex. You should only get paid for something you work hard at.
WHY IS HE GONE WHEN I ACTUALLY HAVE THE AMOUT OF ESTROGEN TO HUMP A SQUIRREL?!?!
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
Had the best sex Thursday night then Friday night I met his girlfriend. The worst thing is we became friends like she gave me her number.
Is it wrong that I get drunk and let him eat me out then fall asleep? He offers me so much and yet I do nothing. I feel like a republican.
I've officially dedicated my newly single life to making myself squirt.
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
I just want my kids to know I fucked some really hot dudes before their father.
You're going to scar your kids
You know darned well I have a well-documented weakness for redheads, Subway and hand-drawn graphic novels.
Ya can’t just go throwing accusations around about someone pooping their pants without some hard evidence
A guy just threw up in my lecture of 500 ppl and just got up and walked away
Just think how much she’ll hate me when she finds out I fucked her father
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