ill find time for any girl whos not afraid to grab my junk in front of 100 people
We waited til after. Not even drunk sex felt right during a Disney movie.
Hey they cleaned all the blood out of the elevator. Also could you pick up some nachos?
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
When they arrested me, they gave me a bracelet with my mugshot and info. When you get one they can be our BFF Bracelets.
There were penises being pulled out everywhere.
Thanks i'm proud of you and I'm proud of beer and vodka for making me drunk
my boss just accepted "because it's 4/20" as a legitimate reason to take Friday off
I punched some guy in the face for being an asshole then later I went to say sorry and give him a hug and he started making out with me. How was your new years?
I'd cum for enchiladas.
I just busted my piggy bank to afford McDonald's. This is my personal cry for help.
I got her number but I don't think I'll be able to smash, I was pretending to be British AND I forgot her name
This morning when you were fucking me you said you'd go to the store and get me tampons and a 30 pack
He had a clap on lamp. So every time he was ramming into me, the lights kept turning on and off
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
Randomize
