We walked through the hotel lobby in slow-mo taking huge steps because we were astronauts, and astronauts obviously can't be drunk.
porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
A freshman just referred to Home Improvement as 'tim the tool man show'. People born after 1990 are not people.
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
My hanfda are one with the u niverse and I am cirretnly inhaling a couch
I'm sorry, but the "Hobbit Slam" has to be a sex move.
I bet his dick wears a tuxedo.
Just make it a game! Like 20 questions STD style.
You kept asking us from the backseat if you were driving ok and then you kept talking to your hiccups and yelling at them to "stop it already!"
So how do I get back in good graces for trying to trade you for superbowl tickets?
I wiped my ass with some girl's sock, I would honestly admit if I hate Caitlin's sandwich.
New drinking game, drink every time Rhianna says "Work" in her new song.
So will your sis find it a compliment if I tell her I lost out on some awesome dick to go to her bday dinner???
I was floored. Like way less concerned with him using drugs than I am with him not believing in evolution.
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
Randomize
