its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
Been drinkin since 3, wearing a tutu, how could things go wrong
You kicked in the door when she was blowing him. You dont remember do you?
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
I pretty much envision me eating a turkey leg whilst fucking you. I have priorities.
Dear America, sometimes I miss your Everclear and its consequences.
Did copperhead road at the bar. All the girl next to me did was stare at my glorious bouncing tits. CAN I FUCKING HELP YOU?? I worked hard for these tits.
Fuck romance. Just shaved my nipples in the shower because I felt like it. That's the life I'm about.
It was just a Craigslist hook up but she wore sweats. Where are the girls with class?
Did you take the bag w/your drugs & cookie cutter?
WHY WOULD YOU SWIPE RIGHT???!!!!!
The same reason I ordered and ate almost an entire pizza last night
I think you just described to us the most perfect drunken fairy tale that has somehow never been written
This couple is walking their pig around campus
Had to clear my browser history. I figured if she used the search bar and her name came up, it might be a little creepy.
Randomize
