look no pants
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
His facebook says he is a fan of "underwater handjobs"
Who was that couple sleeping in your bed with us last night?
I remember desperately screaming that I love my life and running in zig zags all the way home
Hi, this is a test of the morning after apology broadcast system. If you're receiving this pre-recorded message there is a high probability I was a dickwad to you in the past 24 hours. You have my utmost and sincere apologies. Also if you have my wallet, house key, left converse, or lighter, give them/it back
It's hard being an adult. And by that I mean it's hard to tell the boy you like who rejected you that you can't share a room with him at white party because you don't want to see him bang other boys.
The one with glasses said he was keeping my bra. He had me sign it before he left and he said he would be hanging it up in his bunker. I support our troops.
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
List 10 things your GF won't do for you, and we can work through that list.
What's your ideal size in a man?
I just asked if you could cover my shift tomorrow......
Well, if it gives you any indication, when I got there, there was already some dude passed out naked in the treehouse.
It's a good thing he's hot, because it seemed like he was trying to do CPR on my private parts
Well. I had to explain to my niece that the word cunt is not an abbreviation for country. I'm the best aunt in the world.
The last thing I remember is trying to chug the rest of the everclear, running through a fence, and laying down in the snow. I hurt.
Randomize
