I dont ever wanna see you tell my little brother to "spread the seed" ever again
Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
you were carrying around a glass of vodka telling everyone it was Russian water
He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark
so explain to me why i woke up in jail this morning
because you opened a jar or pickles and a bag of fritos and layed down in the middle of aisle 7 while singing 'la cucaracha'
no more ever clear
He woke up licked his hand and put it on my vag and went back to sleep. This is twice this week and its only wednesday
There will be two dogs there to provide supervision. Not to worry.
Ok in all seriousness. Alcohol intake is now restricted for me. I found handcuffs in my trunk.
He told me he doesn't want to fuck anymore because he needs to focus on school. Either he grew a vagina or he's secretly gay, it has to be one of the two.
I never thought I'd say this, but I think I just saw the hottest pregnant chick alive.
He pushed a skinny white blonde out of the way just to tell me "you have the finest ass, like ever."
I have never loved a nerdy white boy this much.
Thats not real though. Slash there are other extenuating circumstances to lead me to believe dick is wanted
HOLY FUCK I SPELLED EXTENUATING RIGHT ON THE FIRST TRY. IM THE BEST DRUNK NA
Sarah is throwing up still and I'm eating salad with my fingers
YOU HAVE PISSED AND FUCKED ON LITERALLY EVERYTHING IN MY HOUSE
Not everything, just a few things. And only a few times. The odds are really not all that bad when you break it down.
you’ve pissed every time you slept over. there’s no such thing as odds anymore. it’s guaranteed
you were acting out moves from the wwe, in a dress. then you sceamed "you can't see me" and ran out of the apt.
Randomize
