I accidentally had sex with my boyfriend's twin last night...and he didn't stop me.
How was it?
Fantastic, but that's not the point.
I just tried to pee in a pad to see if it was like a diaper. it's not.
Hey I have to teach you how to run in heels before vegas
the facebook you made of my ass has 10 times more friends than i do.
we where pretty evenly matched until he threw me through that wall
I know. I almost started crying. IN WHAT UNIVERSE IS THAT A TURN ON?!
She was telling me which girls she thought I should fuck or not at the bar. Why can't all one night stands be that cool after?
Leaving someone plastered on a corner at 3am telling them to just scream for cock is NOT being a good wingman.
I hurt so much. Not in the emotional way, but in the I went to dive bars sorta way.
My 12 o'clock class is an all star team of my ex's hook ups
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
I think you just miss his friendship.
I think it's his ability to give me multiple orgasms.
It was 3 am when she drunkenly tried to deep-fry a banana.
How'd she do that?
i could only love him more if he was covered in glitter.
In honor of Randy Savage we're wearing spandex and handing out slim jim's with option to suplex. Get behind it
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