But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
Stoned at DSW. SO MANY SHOES! THEY'RE FREAKING ME OUT.
ed mcmahon, farrah fawcett, and michael jackson all in one week. What next god, are you juts gonna take my penis too?
i'll give you all the meat in my fridge in exchange for 2 condoms.
I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
side note. good thing you didn't come to drunk breakfast. we were judged by children.
We saluted the chips to the national anthem before cooking them. The house has to get a munchies fryer
I just put my hair into this ponytail & it looks hideous & really cool at the same time. I am dedicating it to the hangover I have
there's a girl on facebook trying to buy me a pizza. I can't say no... right?
Well, if you're getting/have gotten your dick sucked, you're welcome. If not, I tried. Step up your game, pussy. I pulled a MacGuyver and got mine. No excuses bro.
I'm experimenting with sincerity
I have already been up, showered, had a cup of coffee brought to me, added a little rum to cure the hangover, had sex and kicked him out and it's only 1pm. Successful day so far.
The medical term is prolapsed anal walls if you want to look into it with dignity.
I just wanted a bootycall and now somehow I'm at his parents playing dominoes. But they have tequila so it's cool
Randomize
