Every single piece. I examined every single square inch of this peanut butter and jelly sandwich. and fell in love with every inch. that high.
I don't make the first move. Ever. Unless were playing monopoly cause that's my shit
She's the perfect storm when it comes to psycho stalkers
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
So it turns out rose was the bear hunting girl. Fuck my life
None of those words made sense together.
sooo I am sorta kinda using your name as my stripper stage name.
I don't remember much of half-time. I do remember climbing onto the roof of the fraternity and telling people I was going to stargaze in French.
I have a friend that keeps saying he wants to go bear hunting. Thought I would say just walk down church street at night. What intersection is it?
Well I can cross being naked in a minivan off the list
Trust me.. Might look gay.. Might feel gay... But I could snap your neck with my inside thighs bro
well all i have to say, besides fuck you, is YOU try assembling ikea shelves while high on molly.
That sad moment when the drawer I used to keep condoms in now has poptarts in it..
The way I see it, there's 2 types of friends. Those you should do drugs with, and those you really,really shouldn't.
All I want to do is lay in my bed and eat hotdogs
Yea she is hot. But she also had no toothpaste in her entire apartment.
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