I think your x's eyes are broken his new girl is so hit
Hey it's Austin.
I am not drunk enough for this conversation.
I think I have swimmer's ear. From his tongue.
So i've def seen the girl running for student body VP getting fingered in a bar.
dude stop sending me pictures of your dick in weird places. i get it. you rock out with your cock out.
she tried giving me head in the pool. it was more entertaining than pleasurable
A baby just go on our party bus. What. The. Fuck.
He just told an 8 year old to go fuck himself so we probably won't be in the butterfly exhibit much longer.
you puked in the bathtub and said "let them pee"
He put my hand on his penis and said welcome home.
Theres a point where you stop and say hey....as high as I am on LSD right now ...I`m just a man covered in paint
You would be so proud at how green we're being. Re-using last night's jello shot containers.. saving the world one step at a time
Trust me. My dick only does selfies for you.
you were so high you asked for half double stack and half crispy chicken sandwich "welded together" in the wendy's drive through
you woke me up at 1am last night high on cough syrup to tell me jay z was an idiot for cheating on beyonce
Randomize
