Do you know that poor pathetic girl that we should be friends with
Just got done shaving my balls. You were right.
No, we ended up finding him drunk at a bus stop downtown sitting on the bench asking people for chocolates and amazing stories to "rid his mind of his whore of a girlfriend"
I just woke up. In the port-o-potty next to our tailgate. an hour after the game started. explain.
When he came he kept saying "oh god oh god" and he sounded just like his dad. awkward...
Showering in the handicapped shower. Im THAT hungover.
Maybe she got knocked up by accident. I still refuse to believe that anyone actually INTENTIONALLY gets pregnant.
I mean this holiday was built on cheap beer, shitty whisky, and processed meat... and I fully plan to honor that
Hey man your outta milk
How the hell do you keep getting in my apartment?!
I seriously just found a rose petal in my vagina.
It's a 2 hour train ride a 7 in the morning, of course we're bringing alcohol
True enough. Do you ever think that these girls grandparents ghosts are watching you masterbate to their granddaughters and look at you in Shame?
Take your time. I'm mowing the lawn. In the dark. Drunk.
We single women of America need to make America great again by refusing to fuck anyone who supports Trump.
Or is it distressingly heterosexual?
Randomize
