Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
guess who has a date tonight
look at you growing up, going on dates before she hops into bed
he's washing the lighter in the sink and telling me to picture unicorns. requesting backup.
Besides the flaccid incident, it was decent. Average sized. So this is my life now. Loneliness and lackluster sex.
He took the bartender's challenge and took a Jello shot with a tarantula frozen inside.
We won 11 games of beer pong, and then I spent a half hour trying to get into the top bunk. Then i realized it was a cabinet in the bathroom
I could not actually bring myself to utter the phrase "donkey cock" in front of my father. Not possible.
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
He wants Portugal to lose so badly he threw out all the sangria. You know how depressing it is to watch someone dump 4 gallons of heaven?
I'll bring your "congrats on finally banging" cookies tomorrow, I'm exhausted.
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
Then again I went over his house after not hanging out since kindergarten and tried to fuck him so maybe I'm partially to blame here
Dude I used amphetamines responsibly today though. I snorted one in the am for work and then chewed one in the pm for other work. I'm an adult.
I think I fell in love last night
That guy had a face tattoo and was named Cheddar. Please tell me you’re kidding.
So, I almost went hone with a French guy and a drag queen. Together. Then I became sober enough to realize, that's not my style.
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