am i at home because theres a dig starrrrring at me and i dont know wit plus i haer sirens. run fast.
the biggest problem in our relationship is that im team edward and my boyfriend is team jacob
your cum blends into my yellow sheets :/
I heard that if you win you get to have sex with me. You guys really need to stop wagering my vagina.
Well technically because of daylight savings, I only lasted 15 mintues.
I hope to God 2011 is the year I stop loving tequila.
You turned byob into bring your own shit show. Good work.
ur not supposed to find someone to make out with when ur bf takes u to his SISTERS house to hang out with her and her husband
I'm starting to think you fell asleep on your kitchen floor pantless with salsa spilt around you
She left me naked in my bed and without my phone I had her give me her phone number on the calculator on my laptop. It might be fake.
Judging by the garbled spelling in the calendar reminders in my phone, drunk me really wanted sober me to take a pregnancy test today.
I need someone to play with my boobs. Even platonically. I just need a good groping
Get his dick out of your ass and put on some pants we're here
tbh I think I just dated him for his dogs in the first place.
Have you ever thought, hey maybe the reason we were togather that long was because I was drunk the whole relationship?
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