you're bored at work aren't you?
I'm toying with the idea of beating off under my desk
CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
it's fine if we fail the bar, we were never going to satisfy the moral character requirement anyway
What can I say, he stumbled upon the key to my heart: orgasms and mac 'n cheese.
You kept telling the cops that our ice luge was practice for the next winter olympics
oh and then you called a time out with your penis
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
I'd like to say yes, but I nearly lost my shit when I assumed there was no back to my house. I am not strong enough for hallucinations.
This is the second girl that said she wanted to fuck me while wearing a clown nose. Fuck online dating
Some male strippers are here, I threw pancakes at them. It's ok
He also told me he would eat mozzarella sticks before having sex with me so I'm mad at him.
Okay so it turns out that my bf keeps a log of every time I sleep-fart. It's dated back to 2013.
would it be awkward if i bring my husband?
only if i fuck you in the bathroom while he's paying the check
Randomize
